Tells the police he faked an attack
A bloke who thought it would be a wizard wheeze to pretend to be stabbed by a neo-Nazi has been grassed up by his iWatch.
Apple investigates the latest claim
The fruity cargo cult Apple is at the centre of another child-labour scandal – this time over its smartwatch.
Another daylight savings glitch
Comedy developers at Apple have cocked up the programming for summer time yet again, and this time it has resulted in the Apple Watch shutting down when you ask it about the weather.
Wants you to pay for it any way
Fruity Cargo Cult Apple has admitted that its new Apple 3 watch is borked but it is going to sell it to Apple fanboys at the end of the week anyway.
Dinosaurs yes, broke no
A new survey pours cold water on the myth that people use feature phones because they can't afford a smartphone.
Apple fails miserably, despite cuckoo press stories
You might not be aware of it, because the Tame Apple Press is going on an offensive, but Apple is losing the wearable’s market to Fitbit.
Gear S3 Frontier and S3 Classic out next month
Samsung has announced that it will be releasing the Galaxy Gear S3 smartwatch next month.
Michael Gove was too insecure
The UK government has banned Apple's iWatch from its government Cabinet meetings because they can be easily knocked over by the Russians.
Now is not the hour
While the fruity tax-dodger Apple does its best to convince the world that its Smartwatch 2 is any different from the expensive chocolate teapot which was the earlier model, it appears that other more “cutting edge” manufacturers are giving up on the tech.
Be prepared for a snooze
Fruity cargo cult Apple has booked the hall for one of its Nuremberg style rallies on September 7 where US journalists will shame themselves by cheering for products that they know are actually pants.