Published in Mobiles

Apple blames the air for iPhone 6 fault

by on07 December 2016

So remove any air from your environment

The Fruity tax-dodging cargo cult Apple is blaming the air for a fault which causes the iPhone 6 to shut down.

Iphone 6 users have been complaining that after a year’s use their iPhone 6 appeared to get fed up with lowering the standards of the world and being thrust under the faces of non-iPhone users and was just giving up the ghost.

Apple did not really have much interest in fixing the problem, after all iPhone 6 users were expected to upgrade to the practically identical iPhone 7. However it did offer to fix the batteries.

Now, in a press release which has been issued in China  , Apple has said that it has found that the cause of the fault was the Ancient Greek element of air. Apparently, this air gets into the phone and causes the battery to frizz. A work around would be to purge air from the atmosphere around you and avoid breathing on the phone when talking. This is a bit tricky because sound needs air to carry, so you might be ok if you operate your iPhone in a vacuum but you would not hear anything. In space, no one can hear you scream.

Apple is apparently adding new diagnostic tools to the iPhone so that users will be able to spot air and avoid it. Those improvements will be included in future iOS updates.

In its range of excuses for making faulty products, Apple's air infection is right up with its “users are holding it wrong”.

Last modified on 07 December 2016
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