Apple getting more evil, claims rival
Published in News
Thursday, 02 April 2020 11:16

Apple getting more evil, claims rival


Anti-competative

 Tile, which helps users find missing items,said it is completely lost why the convicted monopolist Apple's anti-competative antics are getting worse.

Apple makes sky dark for Android weather watchers
Published in Mobiles

We invented the weather

Apple has given a popular weather app a pile of cash and told it to shut off Android users from the service.

Tame Apple Press admits – people don’t really care about iPhones
Published in Mobiles


Bigger things to worry about

The Tame Apple Press is having to face up to the fact that the coronavirus might have killed off any chance Jobs’ Mob might have had sorting out the declining demand for its iPhone.

Apple considers delaying 5G
Published in Network
Friday, 27 March 2020 11:19

Apple considers delaying 5G


Plenty of time, it is not as if anyone else has 5G out there

Fruity cargo cult Apple is considering sitting on installing 5G in its coming phones.

Apple’s VPN software exposes users
Published in Mobiles
Friday, 27 March 2020 10:52

Apple’s VPN software exposes users

 

Software genii strike again

The fruity cargo cult Apple’s software genii have had yet another success developing VPN software which reveals all its users secrets and stops traffic from being encrypted.

Apple's "Made in India phone" comes a cropper
Published in Mobiles


Suspended due to 21 day lock-down

Apple’s manufacturing partners, Foxconn and Wistron have ‘temporarily’ suspended all iPhone production to comply with government of India’s 21-day lockdown to curb the spread of novel coronavirus.

Speech recognition systems understand white people
Published in News


They are more like us

Speech recognition systems from five of the world's biggest tech companies -- Amazon, Apple, Google, IBM and Microsoft -- make far fewer errors with users who are white than with users who are black.

Apple hangs on to repaired phones
Published in News
Monday, 23 March 2020 11:26

Apple hangs on to repaired phones


It's ours, not yours

All Apple Stores outside of China are closed until further notice due to the ongoing coronavirus pandemic, and it’s preventing some customers from picking up their repaired devices.

Apple cast out from top 10 consumer electronics heaven
Published in Mobiles


Down to number 14

The fruit themed cargo cult has been cast out from among the heavenly hosts of the top five consumer electronics makers.

Apple makes another daft move
Published in News
Thursday, 19 March 2020 11:12

Apple makes another daft move


Believes users will want to give it even more money for nothing

In the middle of a pandemic-fuelled recession, the fruity cargo cult Apple thinks that users will want to give it more money for something stupid.