Fitbit will take on Apple with a useful smartwatch
Published in Wearables


Innovation


The Tame Apple Press is getting its knickers in a twist over how wearable device maker Fitbit has released a smartwatch which is direct competition to their favourite manufacturer.

Former Apple worker admits the touch-bar was pointless
Published in Notebooks


Jobs’ Mob suckered users with pointless technology 

Chuq Von Rospach, a former Apple employee and commentator, has slammed the MacBook maker for forcing consumers to pay extra for the Touch which gave them practically nothing.

Apple gets $208 million in tax breaks to build Iowa data centre
Published in News


Which accounting monkey thought this was a good idea?

The fruity tax-dodging cult Apple has managed to convince the US tax payers to give it $208 million in sweeteners to build a data centre.

Chinese mobile sales slump
Published in Mobiles


Looks like that market will not save anyone soon


Hopes that the Chinese mobile market might pick-up and save the cash cows of one-hit-wonders like Apple have been dashed by new figures from Digitimes Research.

Apple defends itself against claims that it is responsible for fanboy car crashes
Published in News


Fanboys claim Apple should have protected them

Apple fanboys have taken Jobs’ Mob to court for not doing enough to protect them while driving.

Hackers penetrate Apple's inner sanctum
Published in News


Security coprocessor has been hacked


A hacker by name of "Xerub" has made a mockery of Apple’s Apple's Secure Enclave Processor (SEP) firmware.

Apple wants to buy entertainment content
Published in News


Can’t make its own

The Fruity Tax-dodging cargo-cult Apple has shown up in Hollywood with its huge cheque book with the aim of buying some shows that people want to watch – rather than what brainwashed Apple execs want to watch.

Apple may get rid of fingerprint reader
Published in Mobiles


Will rely instead on smug aura detectors

The fruity tax-dodging cargo cult Apple, in a desperate move to increase margins on its failing iPhone, has decided to abandon the expensive fingerprint reader.

Qualcomm details Apple modem issue
Published in News


Tells the watchdog

Chipmaker Qualcomm showed further details about the impact of the fruity cargo-cult Apple refusing to pay up on its licences and its modem competition with Intel.

Google pays Apple billions to stay on iPhone
Published in Mobiles


That's a nice little search engine we would hate for it to be broken

Google is shelling out billions of dollars in protection to the fruity tax-dodging cult Apple so that it can stay the default search engine on iPhones and iPads.