Can’t make its own
The Fruity Tax-dodging cargo-cult Apple has shown up in Hollywood with its huge cheque book with the aim of buying some shows that people want to watch – rather than what brainwashed Apple execs want to watch.
Will rely instead on smug aura detectors
The fruity tax-dodging cargo cult Apple, in a desperate move to increase margins on its failing iPhone, has decided to abandon the expensive fingerprint reader.
Tells the watchdog
Chipmaker Qualcomm showed further details about the impact of the fruity cargo-cult Apple refusing to pay up on its licences and its modem competition with Intel.
That's a nice little search engine we would hate for it to be broken
Google is shelling out billions of dollars in protection to the fruity tax-dodging cult Apple so that it can stay the default search engine on iPhones and iPads.
Expenses probably because of new iPhone costs
The cocaine nose jobs of Wall Street are furious that Apple’s number one chum Foxconn fell short of its estimates by a huge 25 percent.
European Union action concentrates their minds
A report said that Apple and Ireland are cooperating in an attempt to avoid a huge tax bill imposed by the European Union last year.
Standing against the Steve Jobs's design disaster
Apple developers are revolting against the terrible design of Steve Jobs and Jony Ive’s “ufo” headquarters.
It will be 25 years before there are any benefits
The “great deal” which would see Foxconn open a show factory in the US is laced with so many sweeteners it looks like it will be a quarter of century before Illinois will see any benefit.
Got you hooked on the cult
Steve Jobs saw the iPod shuffle as a cheap way of getting young kids hooked on the Apple cult.
Falling profits, lower sales, chinese outlook bleak – press still goes mental
The fruity, tax-dodging, cargo-cult Apple managed to convince the world’s press it was doing ok despite falling iPhone sales, declines in China and a fall in profits by 14.6 percent.