Apple tries to drag Valve into Epic war
Published in News
Monday, 22 February 2021 09:58

Apple tries to drag Valve into Epic war


Valve wants to be Swiss

Apple apparently subpoenaed Valve Software in November 2020, demanding it provide huge amounts of commercial data about Steam sales and operations going over multiple years.

Mysterious malware hits 30,000 Macs
Published in News
Monday, 22 February 2021 09:22

Mysterious malware hits 30,000 Macs


Crisis of faith

A piece of malware has been found on almost 30,000 Macs worldwide and apparently it has baffled the Tame Apple Press.

Apple wins battle of North Dakota
Published in Mobiles
Wednesday, 17 February 2021 13:25

Apple wins battle of North Dakota


Senators too scared they might kill their iPhones

The North Dakota state senate voted 36-11 on Tuesday not to pass a bill that would have required app stores to enable software developers to use their own payment processing software and avoid fees charged by Apple and Google.

Epic takes Apple war to EU
Published in Gaming
Wednesday, 17 February 2021 13:18

Epic takes Apple war to EU


Antitrust in the EU

Epic Games is taking its legal battle against Apple global, filing an antitrust complaint in Europe against the iPhone maker.

Apple's electric car fantasy continues to dominate press
Published in Transportation


Opinion: Tame Apple Press needs to let it go

The Tame Apple Press cannot get it into its head that Apple cannot make an electric car using the same “screw your suppliers” business model that has made it a fortune in the tech industry.

Nissan will not touch Apple with a ten foot pole
Published in Transportation


Apple did not get to talk with senior managers

Japanese car company Nissan has mocked rumours in the Tame Apple Press that it was entertaining an offer from Jobs' Mob to make its self-driving car.

Zuckerberg wants to cause Apple pain
Published in News
Monday, 15 February 2021 10:56

Zuckerberg wants to cause Apple pain


Damn, we don’t know who we want to win this one

Social notworking Tsar, Mark Zuckerberg, has angered the Tame Apple press by wanting to hurt its favourite company.

Apple declares war on North Dakota
Published in News
Friday, 12 February 2021 12:34

Apple declares war on North Dakota


The State will kill the iPhone

Fruity cargo cult Apple has warned that the State of North Dakota will do what common sense has failed to do – kill off the iPhone.

Apple should copy Tesla on Bitcoin
Published in News
Wednesday, 10 February 2021 12:31

Apple should copy Tesla on Bitcoin


RBC Capital Market’s advice

RBC Capital Markets says Apple could make a tidy sum if it decided to start being more innovative and copy Tesla by getting into cryptocurrencies.

Apple reassures that Indian plant has opened
Published in Mobiles
Tuesday, 09 February 2021 12:23

Apple reassures that Indian plant has opened


Wage rebellion closed Wistron plant

Apple said Wistron had begun the process of restarting operations at its violence-hit factory in southern India and that it was working with the Taiwanese firm to ensure that all necessary systems were in place.