Insiders say Job’s Mob does not care about Macintosh any more
Yesterday the Tame Apple Press was full of stories about how Tim Cook really loved the Macintosh and was going to release new and important hardware updates in the future.
Not worth the wait
Apple’s overpriced Airbuds might have shipped before Christmas after all but they are proving to be a disaster for users and the environment.
Trying to reassure staff they are super cool and loved after all
Apple’s Steve Ballmer, Tim Cook has been trying to reassure staff that he has not given up on desktop technology.
S8 will be 20 per cent more
The dark satanic rumour mill has manufactured a hell on earth yarn that Samsung has decided to copy one of Apple’s more surreal features – is silly pricing.
Tries to patent a dual-sim iPhone
Fruity tax-dodging cargo cult Apple has finally worked out that everyone is using dual sim smartphones and is frantically trying to claim it invented the idea.
No lunch for you Oliver Twist
While Apple has been in hot water for over working employees working with its Chinese partners, it appears that the tax-dodging cargo cult treats its US workers poorly too.
Prototypes for now
Back in October, a report circulated that Samsung and LG were seeking to win orders for the manufacture of “out-foldable” OLED panels with major smartphone manufacturers for use in upcoming devices.
And nine million bicycles in Beijing
Figures in from the Far East show that the Chinese smartphone market is hotting up.
Donald “Prince of Orange” Trump met up with Silicon Valley’s big names yesterday to repair the damage of the election campaign.
Have faith in our marketing claims
The fruity tax-dodging cargo cult Apple has a novel way of stopping its users from finding out the truth about its bogus marketing claims about battery life – it has stripped the iOS from any method of measuring it.