Everyone else copied it
Apple has baffled those technology journalists who have not sold their souls to the fruity cargo cult by claiming that it is already doing AI and it is right up there with the big boys and girls.
Poor reliability claims report
The fruity cargo cult Apple’s iPhone cash cow is dying on its feet as crashing apps, dodgy wi-fi and general poor reliability make it a poor alternative to Android.
But still no recovery
Global tablet shipments are expected to bounce back a little bit, but there are still no signs that the product is recovering.
It is as if they know the iPhone 7 is coming
While the Tame Apple Press is trying to drum up support for what looks like a terminally dull iPhone 7, the existing iPhone 6 and 6s/ Plus models are mysteriously sending themselves into Silicon Heaven with the enthusiasm of a Japanese kamakazi pilot.
Copying Apple again
The Tame Apple Press is furious that Samsung appears to be copying its favour company's idea to flog second hand phones.
Siri is still rubbish
While it is being touted as a cure for cancer by the Tame Apple Press, Barbara Streisand is unimpressed with its AI browser Siri.
Inovation, Apple has heard of it
When it was first released, the iWatch was slammed for needing an iPhone to work. After all, there is no point having an iWatch if you have to carry your phone around too. Now, two years later, the crack inovators at Apple still have not managed to fix the problem.
Coming to a Mac and Linux machine near you
Software King of the World, Microsoft, has announced that its Powershell automation and scripting system is going open source.
90 percent will not buy the iPhone 7
Fruity cargo cult Apple might be in serious trouble as most Apple fanboys say they will not upgrade to the iPhone 7.