Published in Mobiles

iPhone tells fanboys when they will die

by on03 November 2014



Seconds if they try to tell me an iPhone is great

Apple fanboys are apparently relying on their iPhones to tell them when they are going to die. A new iPhone app, Deadline, uses Apple’s HealthKit API and uses an algorithm, which takes into account certain metrics about your lifestyle, in order to calculate when you will snuff it.

To make sure that you don’t miss your appointment with the Grim Reaper the app adds a countdown widget to your iPhone’s drop down menu.

"Deadline uses statistical information to attempt to determine your date of expiration, but no app can really accurately determine when you will die, so consider this a way to motivate yourself to be healthier, and consult a physician as necessary,” Deadline says.

This might be true, but what is more worrying is that it uses Apples HealthKit to gather its data. Most people will not trust Apple Maps to lead them across the road, let alone have their phone tell them when they are on their way to meet Steve Jobs. The general theme behind the app seems to be to scare people into living healthier life style, eating better and getting more exercise. However most Apple fan boys cannot wait to meet Steve Jobs, even if he is in hell for lowing the standards of the world, and stealing disabled people’s car parking spaces. Our guess is that most of the Apple fanbase will see that much hoped for meeting get closer the more they shovel in their mouths and just eat more.

Of course, the shortest way for an Apple Fanboy to see Steve Jobs is to try and tell me that the iPhone 6 is a cure for cancer. There is nothing like entering the gates of hell with a bent phone stuffed in your ear. Microsoft users go straight to heaven, the Universe believes they have suffered enough.

Rate this item
(0 votes)

Read more about: