Shonky, and grossly overpriced court told
The fruity cargo-cult Apple is not having a good week - not only has its iPhone X launch been greeted with howls of derision, now it has been sued over the advertising for its overpriced Beats headphones.
To use some of the features you paid for you have to buy more stuff
Fruity cargo cult Apple is trying to flog an incredibly over-priced Iphone X but it seems that its $1000 starting price does not include important things like a charger.
Comment: Helping a company flog an out-of-date phone at twice the price
The Tame Apple Press has sensed that its Apple OverLords might need a hand flogging the out-of-date over-priced iPhoneX to the world and is pulling out all the stops.
With A11 Bionic chip, wireless charging and more
Although the iPhone X was obviously the star of the show, Apple has also unveiled its new iPhone 8 and iPhone 8 Plus smartphones, both featuring the fancy new 64-bit A11 Bionic chip, new camera(s) and an "all-new" design.
It also makes them for those with sellable organs
In a move which shows how in touch Tim Cook is with poor people, the Apple CEO claimed the cargo cult didn’t make products just for rich people.
Fudzilla told you 2 years ago
Apple A11 is a six core ARM based SoC that now has Apple graphics inside. Apple claims that it is 30 percent faster than the previous PowerVR GPU in the iPhone 7. Fudzilla exclusively reported about this almost two years ago, and we were right.
C’mon you bastards, pay your tax like everyone else
France, Germany, Italy and Spain are expected to get tough with big US tech by demanding that they be taxed in Europe based on their revenues, rather than only profits.
Tame Apple Press rather upset
Despite its best efforts to remind users about the incredibly inflammable Note 7, the Tame Apple Press has been unable to stop Note 8 pre-orders from hitting record levels.